Pinocchio - Walt Disney

Of all the Disney films, I always felt that Pinocchio was the darkest and more adult of them all, and upon watching it again, I can see exactly how dark it is. It explores the problem with vices such as violence, alcohol and smoking. It also deals with child abduction and child slavery, as well as a creepy old single guy playing with dolls. This film would have Freud's mind working overtime!

The film is lovely though, it really takes me back to my childhood, but I do not think it should be a child's film. Children turning into donkeys and old Gypsy men locking children in cages is not something a 5 year old should be watching. One thing I forgot was the abundance of songs in the film, which was a welcome reminder of the greatness of the film.

Another thing which stands out is the lack of women in the story, the only female characters are the Blue Fairy (who is shown as perfect and beautiful) and the little girls running to school (who are insignificant to the story) This lack of women shows that this film is meant to be a morality for men and little boys, that little boys should not partake in vice otherwise they will end up as donkeys.

For all the twistedness this film shows, it is a classic and I really enjoyed watching it again. 8 out of 10 is a fair score for a dark kids film.

Hobgoblins - Rick Sloane

This film is the epitome of bad! This is part of my worst list and this is just awful, the story is flimsy, the acting is at best wooden and the monsters are just shit. An obvious rip-off and cash in of the Gremlins films, Hobgoblin includes little "monsters" which tap into your deepest desires and uses those desires to kill you.

The first point I would like to make is that the film does not make any sense, the first person who dies at the hand of these things is a security guard, who dies from falling off of a stage (in his fantasy) to end up dead on the floor of the Hobgoblin's vault. There is no stage in there, but subsequent fantasies include the real setting. Its just utterly confusing.

Secondly, the monsters are shit. When the characters fight with them, they are fighting with teddies of the Hobgoblins and when they are running around they are obviously just hand puppets.

Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad film. Awful. 1 out of 10 because I laughed once. Bad!

BAD!

Gran Torino - Clint Eastwood

It turns out I made a mistake during my last blog. I said the next film was Pinocchio but infact it was Gran Torino starring, directed by and produced by Clint Eastwood. Having not much experience with the Eastwood brand, only having seen Dirty Harry before, it was nice to see what an Eastwood modern film is like. It was dark, it was gritty, it was racist and it also was satisfying.

Firstly I felt the acting was not brilliant, Eastwood was dodery and the supporting characters were just a little wooden for me. But it is the story which is the saving grace of this film. The old man hates his surroundings but then once he starts to embrace them then they learns to like them. The difference in this story is Eastwood plays an aging Vietnam vet who is very racist and the neighbours are all Hmong residents from China.

Also the twist at the end was pretty amazing, it got you guessing but you could never see it coming. It was very good! Mainly though, I felt the film was a little too slow and that bugged me in the end. I wanted it to end.

This film exceeded my expectations and for that gets a 8 out of 10!

Rambo: First Blood - Ted Kotcheff

Firstly an apology for not posting more recently, I have had exams and today I finished them. Hazaar! I plan on watching a lot more movies and doing this blog!
Anyway, Rambo. Well it is an alright action movie, but it all seemed a little bit needless. Rambo may not of killed anyone, but the running and the punching and the maiming all seemed a little too much. OK they were trying to kill him but at least actually kill them.

I did enjoy the idea that this repressed anger came from being tortured and captured in Vietnam, but that was a very brief glance at his past, the rest was Sly Stallone running and using his knife for random purposes.

Brian Dennehy as Will, the Sheriff was a good antagonist, but for me the film brought about the question: Who is the villain? John Rambo who is hunting all of these innocent people, or the civilians who are just trying to restore law and order to their little town?

Overall this film got a 5 out of 10 from me, I enjoyed it but there was no real substance to make it a perfectly enjoyable movie.

Seconds - John Frankenheimer

This was a difficult film to get hold of but after watching it I am glad I did try so hard. It is a science fiction film based upon the idea that people can get another chance at life by having intense plastic surgery. Starring Rock Hudson, the film gets off on a pretty boring note, but once he enters the Comapany it starts to pick up.

Now the twist at the end is not particularly surprising as I guessed it, but it was still a twist and worked very well. Parts of the film (the grape stomping scene) was so surreal it reminded me of Juliet and the Spirits which I have viewed before.

Overall this film gets a 6 out of 10, because it was good and interesting but did not give the punch which I would of liked.

Hold Me While I'm Naked - George Kuchar

The reason this is so quick to come after the previous blog is because George Kuchar's film is only 15 minutes long. This makes it easy to view and I need to say that I did not enjoy it. It was an obvious look at sexual frustration and loneliness, but I did not really think it was anything great.

One scene which really got me hooked was the shower scene in which a choir based song was sung over scenes of people in the shower. It just felt right, and it felt like a triumphant scene which showed the characters getting on with their lives.

Rating wise, this gets a 3 out of 10, the reason it has 3 is because I mainly did not get the film but the one scene pushed this above the 1 it was going to get.

If you are interested in seeing this film then it is available online at: http://www.ubu.com/film/kuchar_holdme.html

Doctor Zhivago - David Lean

Sorry I have not written for a long time, I am currently going through some exams at University so have not had a lot of time to watch films but after today's film I decided to watch the next one! Dr Zhivago, always seen as a classic, has now been viewed. It pleasantly surprised me. It was a very lovely film, it was not funny, it was not scary, it was not thrilling; it just felt like a nice movie.

The bit which interested me the most was the part in the train where Zhivago and his wife and her father are riding to somewhere better. Another scene was the marching through the snow and the rebellion on the street, otherwise it was a lovely film.

I really cannot describe how on the fence I am with this film, on one hand it actually held my attention for 3 hours plus, but on the other hand it didn't capture my imagination. I do not think I can explain anymore. Just one more note, Alec Guinness rocks my world, and Julie Christie was very beautiful in her hay-day.

It gets a 5 out of 10 from me, due to all the reasons stated above. Sorry I did not say more but it is hard to say something about a film that I do not know what I think about it.

Jacob's Ladder - Adrian Lyne

I had read that this was a pretty scary movie so I was looking forward to this. I have recently found a great love for horror and this film disappointed me if I am going to be honest. It made me jump once, and I felt it was too story orientated and not scare orientated!

I did enjoy the psychological aspect of the film, with the constant fantasies and flashbacks proving exciting stuff, but the whole Vietnam story just grated. It was nice to see a small role by Ving Rhames as a fellow Vietnam vet. One moment made me laugh out loud, and that was when Tim Robbins started crying over a picture of Macaulay Culkin. It was just such a surreal moment when the boy from Home Alone was on the picture, but Culkin was Robbins' dead kid so it made sense in the end.

The demon actually looked menacing but you only saw them for half seconds. One scene which did sorta creep me out was when the demon seemed to have sex with Robbins' girlfriend. Freaky! I want to say I enjoyed the twist at the end, I like that none of that happened and that it was all a sort of Purgatory rather than real life. Finally Robbins and Home Alone kid got to go to heaven.

Anyway as I was so indifferent about this film it gets a 6 out of 10. Hazaar!

Catwoman - Pitof

What a God awful movie this is! Just bad. I hated this so much, it was like watching a cat being strangled by a cliche. Oh god it was awful. I think there should be a new classification of film: SWSS (Shit With Sharon Stone) It is the worst film I have seen in a long time.

Halle Berry (what ever happened to her?) is such a bad actor in this. Her character uses poor excuses for puns, including "purrrrfect", and it just makes you cringe. The storyline was bad, it didn't make sense, it didn't engage the audience and it felt so contrived. Sharon Stone is possibly the worst actress ever, and her superpower was boring. Oh so you have super hard skin, just like a crocodile, but its smooth so you look young!

I really have nothing else to write about this rubbish film. Its a 2 out of 10 for me. The special effects were not bad at all and Halle Berry is a stunning woman!

On The Town - Stanley Donen

The first musical on the list and one I was not familiar with. I am a big fan of musicals so it was nice to watch something as enjoyable as On The Town. The three sailors and their quest for girls had me in stitches. It was pretty witty to be honest and the hour and a half just flew by.

I couldn't give you a favourite character as every single one was hilarious. Frank Sinatra knows exactly how to act and be funny, while Gene Kelly was exceptional as a sailor who found and lost his love in the space of 20 minutes. This love of his, played by Vera-Ellen was stunning. One of the prettiest girls I have seen from the 40's and a very good dancer as well. The scene called Miss Turnstile Ballet was genius and could be done by a group like Diversity from Britain's Got Talent. It was mesmerisingly brilliant.

The only downside for me was the songs, I felt New York, New York was pretty catchy but the rest did not feel like real showstoppers. They were just that little bit too bland to be catchy. They were sung very well they just were not very good.

Overall I enjoyed this film and from me it gets a 7 out of 10. The next film to be reviewed is going to be number one from the worst movies ever, Catwoman. I can't wait!

Angels With Dirty Faces - Michael Curtiz

The first film I have watched in this list that features many classic actors. These are actors I class as being seen as the greats of my mother's and her mother's generation. James Cagney and Humphrey Bogart star in this gangster film, but this has a twist. Its a very simple story; two friends, one ended up as a gangster, one as a priest (which is obviously going to cause friction) but when the gangster does wrong, the priest starts a campaign against the criminal underworld.

OK maybe the plot is not simple, but the acting is marvellous. James Cagney IS Rocky Sullivan, he is cheeky, rough and cocky as a gangster should be. For me the best actor was Pat O'Brien. Playing a priest has to be difficult, but playing a priest with a slightly dodgy background and a best friend who does not conform to the ideals of religion has to be pretty tough. But O'Brien pulls it off, you believe he cares for his friend but also cares for God.

I am not a fan of the 'Dead End' Kids. I hate kids, they annoy me, and one of them looked like a pig nosed boy from my secondary school, so they were not my favourite characters. But I did enjoy the joviality they added to the plot, their constant youthful vigour and more importantly, their little subplots that added a little variety to the movie.

Overall I really enjoyed Angels With Dirty Faces, and I like the idea that the only reason the priest didn't become like the gangster was because "he couldn't run as fast as me" This film gets a 7 out of 10 from me. Thoroughly enjoyed it!

Dirty Harry - Don Siegel

Two in one day, I am on a role. This is the 25th movie in the list and what a cracker! Clint Eastwood stars as maverick cop, Harry Callahan (nicknamed Dirty Harry due to the fact he does all the dirty jobs) I thoroughly enjoyed watching this film, it had action, suspense, a crazy villain and a like able (I do not really know that like able is the word) protagonist.

The story itself is simple, a gunman will kill one person a day until he gets some money, but Harry has other plans. In the latter part of the film, Harry is sent on a race through San Francisco answering telephones to find the man. This was an obvious inspiration for Die Hard III in which the same thing happens. Obviously with such a famous film, you get memorable moments, and in this film it occurs when Harry asks "Do you feel lucky, well do ya, punk?"

The film is a good old fashioned thriller, but it didn't completely win me over. I felt the supporting cast was a bit weak, I never felt Harry got the full backlash from his superiors, and the villain may of been a little over the top. Andy Robinson, who played the gunman, has such an evil look and evil laugh that he was menacing but maybe a little pantomime!

Well for such a stella film I wouldn't be able to go below 7, but I feel for the addictiveness of it, it will get a 8 out of 10 from me.

Tirez Sur Le Pianiste - Francois Truffaut

A further French film (the third one in the first 24 of this list) and I found quite a difficult one to watched. I watched and was sort of hooked, but then I did get bored very easily, so I had a very weird discomfort while watching. The story is a complex one, and it seems to fit in the film noir film genre, but it just didn't engage me.

One thing though, I did find parts of the film funny, I actually laughed out lout. There was one of the "crooks" talking to Fido, and he swore on his mother's life. The next scene is a woman falling down dead and that is pretty funny and original for 1960. Also the man in the hat and man in the cap are like a bickering married couple, it is really quite funny.

Also the French females all seem to be very sensual and sexy, but in this and in Le Doulos, they seem to get naked, which to me seems unnecessary. If nudity adds something to a story then fine, but a quick glimpse of boob just confuses me, why should it be in there. To show that the women are desirable?

Anyway, I find this film was the same as Le Doulos, good storyline but bore dme slightly, hence it gets the same as Le Doulos, 4 out of 10.

The Great Escape - John Sturges

I have seen many things about this movie, read many reviews, seen it appear on countless lists of the best movies ever, even seen it advertised numerous times on Christmas TV but I have never really fancied watching it. I was missing one of the greatest films ever made, it is gripping, funny, well acted and has Nazi's in it. What else can you ask for!

Firstly the story is amazing, and to think it is based upon a real story is amazing. I felt for every single character and it was nice to see such famous faces as James Coburn, Charles Bronson, Richard Attenborough, James Garner and of course, Steve McQueen. I would have to say my favourite was James Garner, I felt he was funny, charming and just a little bit cocky in his role as a scavenger for the group.

Richard Attenborough was marvellous and I actually felt sad when he was shot at the end. (Although if there ever was a remake, I think the Richard Attenborough role should go to Eddie Izzard) The plan was an ingenious one, the only problem was the Germans. Now I don't like to criticise but to me the Nazi's seemed too nice, they dealt with the escape-crazy gang with a sort of pomp which made them less threatening.

No talk of The Great Escape would be complete without a massive hand to Elmer Bernstein who came up with one of the most iconic film scores in history! I will be humming the tune for days to come. All in all a fantastic movie, and I think this is going to be a 10 out of 10. The movie went by so quickly that I it was an hour shorter than it actually was. Storytelling at its very best.

Le Doulos - Jean-Pierre Melville

Another French movie, this time a film-noir about gangstas! I will admit to you that I was bored during the first half of the movie, I lost the plot of the storyline and was confused at how Silien was getting away with being a bastard! Other confused came from how to pronounce his name! Sicilian? Sillyben? Scimimim? Anyway I was getting close to boredom and then the second half, and more importantly, the reveal, showed exactly what the movie was about. It was not about a bastard who was playing everyone, it was about a bastard who was looking out for his friends and put a very clever plan in action.

I am not going to go into the depths of the plot, but the plot reveal is fantastic. Also, I like the fact it was filmed in black and white, it gave a grittier feel to the movie without trying to make it purposely so. Very well shot and the ladies were very pretty. i don't say this much in movies, but these French women were stunning!

The actor who plays Salmonella looks remarkably like a cross between Brookie actor Philip Olivier and Katie Price's latest meal, Alex Reid. Anyway I give this movie a 4 out of 10. The majority of it bored me but it recouped the 4 by having a very clever ending.

Just a quick note on this blog, I have decided it is unfair to actually just review the best of the best, so every 2 weeks or so I shall be watching a film that has been called the shittest of the shit. This will start with Catwoman in about 2 or 3 movies time!

Scorpio Rising - Kenneth Anger

I really do not know what to make of the film. It was bizarre but not in a good way. All I know is that there was a lot of sixties based movies playing over a storyline which seemed to centre around a biker who then watched a motorcycle race. I am not 100% on the plot as the whole thing made no sense to me.

There were bits when a screen with a man holding his erect penis was interspersed with a movie in which Jesus was curing a blind man. It just made no sense to me. I am sure I will go and read some reviews and find it all clicks, but at this current moment the 27 minutes of music and motorcycles makes no sense.

This film is a 2 out of 10, and it only got those 2 as the music was fantastically retro.

The Thin Blue Line - Errol Morris

The first documentary on the list and a subject that I have seen many documentaries on before. This was one of the first documentaries to include a reconstruction and it was actually a brilliantly put together piece of work. This will be a fairly short review as I can not really talk about acting etc, but I feel that this was standout due to the fact the real murder was uncovered.

The score was haunting and the witnesses were dumb. My favourite was a man who claimed to have "perfect recall" but then couldn't remember if the car was a blue Ford or a blue something, and couldn't quite remember where the policeman had been when this man passed the scene. Brilliant comedy from that young man. I also love the lady with the big fat nose!

Sorry it was short, but there is not much I can really say. This film/documentary gets a 7 out of 10 as it was gripping but maybe got a bit repetitive.

Peeping Tom - Michael Powell

I started watching Peeping Tom with a certain amount of scepticism, I know it was an early sixties movie and had been controversial in its time, but what is controversial now is not what is controversial in the sixties. But having watched the film, god it is easy to see where the controversy arouse. Not only does this man kill for the pleasure, but he makes his own victims watch as they die. It is horrific really.

Carl Boehm plays mild mannered Mark Lewis who is the killer and peeping tom of the movie. He acts very well and I was shocked that the character was played by a foreign actor, Boehm himself was born in Austria, and I felt that the Germanic accent that was used could of been a slight wink at WWII. That was the only thing about WWII I felt could be deduced, and I thought I had better get it out there.

The story itself was very much like a modern day slasher film, but the main difference is that we know exactly who the killer is from the start. This, I feel, makes us sympathise with the character, we learn he was regularly tested as a child for the affects of fear, and this makes us feel Mark's venerability.

The film never seemed to engage me, and I never got so into it that I wanted to know what happened, but I can see how it could appeal, especially at the time of release. I will give this film a 4 out of 10 as it interested me on some level, but it didn't have that brilliant factor.

National Lampoon's Animal House - John Landis

I have seen this movie on many different lists, especially the funniest comedies, but they clips I was shown were never really that funny. So I was intrigued by my first viewing of this film. And I can honestly say I was pleasantly surprised. It was witty, fast-paced and just a little smug. OK the acting was not fantastic, but in this sort of film I do not think it is important that it be the best acting in the world, as long as the comic talent hits all the right notes.

Tom Hulce (who was later seen playing the role of his lifetime in Amadeus) is brilliant as Pinto, but for me the movie belongs to Tim Matheson as Otter. He is witty, charming and cocky in all the right places. He is most famous for his role as Senator John Hoynes in The West Wing, but I think this shows he can do funny as well as serious.

I am not going to rant and rave about John Belushi as I don't think he is that special in this film, yes he is funny, but I think with the material anyone would of been excellent. The biggest laugh for me came with one brief shot, in which the marching band are in a dead end and they are just marching into a brick wall but they keep playing. The absurdity of it just tickled me.

It is easy to see that this paved the way for such movies as American Pie and even Scary Movie, but I think Animal House is a pretty important movie in the film canon. My mark is 7 out of 10, purely because it made me laugh a few times.

Eye's Wide Shut - Stanley Kubrick

This is the first Kubrick film I have ever seen, and it was surprising. I have heard a lot of bad things about Eye's Wide Shut but I found it gripping and well done, if not a little confusing at the end. Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman play a married couple who obviously want other people, but they feel obliged to each other. This creates tension which then manifests itself into Tom Cruise going to the weirdest house party ever, in which people are having sex all over the place, and everyone wears a mask!

One minor grievance I have with the fucking movie is the unneeded swearing. Nicole Kidman keeps saying fuck and in one scene Sidney Pollack says tits, and it does not flow. They sound like twats and it really starts to get on your cocking nerves after a while (By swearing through this paragraph I am showing exactly how annoying it sounds) The last word of the film is fuck, and the film just seemed to end. I can see how it is probably an insightful look at couples and sex, but all I heard was the occasional swear word and saw the occasional breast

Also this movie has got to have the most nipple and breasts I have ever seen on film. They are everywhere, even Nicole Kidman gets hers out for the boys. Kubrick is a master, and this film really shows clever thought and direction, but the nudity just reminded me of my own insignificant body!

Overall, 8 out of 10 because I really enjoyed the film and I felt it was very well acted, but sadly the end and the shitty swearing ruined it a tad for me.

Skammen - Ingmar Bergman

This is the first Bergman film I have ever seen and only the second Swedish film I have ever seen and if I am honest I don't know how I feel about it. Parts of the film I found interesting, the acting was superb and the story was interesting, but then parts I just did not enjoy, I felt parts were contrived and the characters seemed to change their minds very easily without any warning.

I think it looked good, the black and white was really interesting and made the story seem older than it was. Especially when they were driving a car and listening to a radio. I felt this device made it harder to connect the pictures with what was actually going on. Also I am not learned in Swedish history so could not place the way that was being thought.

Liv Ullmann, who played Eva, is a very beautiful woman and reminds me of a previous flame, which was nice as I felt I cared for this character, even if she did show signs of poor judgement and a nasty streak when it came to her husband. Also I felt her want of a child was heartbreaking, and even when she found a substitute for a child in the young soldier, it was brutally snatched away from her by the one man she wanted children with.

All in all this film has left me not knowing if I was satisfied watching it or not, and for that reason, it gets a 5 out of 10.

La Stanza Del Figlio - Nanni Moretti

I will admit that I took a long time to actually get round to watching this, the DVD cover didn't excite me and neither did the synopsis, but I finally watched it tonight and I was pleasantly surprised. After the initial build up of story it was a moving portrayal of a family's grief following the death of their son, and how exactly the family members cope with the loss.

Director and main actor, Nanni Moretti, is brilliant as psychologist Giovanni who seems to be able to get into everyone elses head but his own. After the loss of the son, Giovanni starts to imagine how he could of stopped the death and starts to actually treat some of his patients badly he blames them for the death. One thing that striked me is that the film wasn't a spectacular feast for the eyes, there were no brilliant shots of scenery, or massive special effects, or even contrived storyline. It was very realistic, so realistic that I felt upset when the son died.

The scene in which the sons is seen boarding the boat, just before his death, was amazingly filmed, and the young actress who played the daughter was phenomenal. The mother, Laura Morante was a delight (but I didn't enjoy her crying, it sounded like a laugh more than anything)

This films gets a 4 out of 10 as it was watchable but I didn't feel it made the connection that some other films have.

Just a little note, I have decided to expand the list of films to include any different additions from the Empire Top 500 Movies, which then takes the total number of movies IO shall watch to 1261!

Toy Story - John Lasseter

I can remember seeing this film at the cinema when I was just a little tyke and loved it so much; it was funny, imaginative and felt new. I worried that my opinion would change now that I am a little older. Oh how naive I was. It seemed fresher to me now, I got all of the jokes, I saw the underlying themes of the dangers of jealously and the problems of bullying, I even felt that the whole premise worked as a masterpiece of film.

There are quite a few adult-flavoured jokes, especially the part in which Mr Potato-Head takes his lips off and smacks them up against his behind, hinting that somebody was a kiss ass. This is not something I would have got when I was little, but now I see it is a funny little action from a character who is actually quite dark. He seems to lead the other toys when they will not accept Woody back into the fold, because they believe he killed Buzz. I actually do not like Mr Potato-Head anymore.

It is brilliantly constructed, the voices suit the characters so very well, and if I had to pick a favourite character, I would have to say it is the Pizza Planet aliens. They are just the most adorable things in the world, and I challenge you not to want one!

Score wise, this will be a 9 out of 10 as it is entertaining, funny and just a brilliant movie, one of the best kids films I have seen.

Der Letzte Mann - F.W. Murnau

Sorry it has been so long, the film did not turn up so I had to purchased another copy, but it came today so I thought I would watch it. Der Letzte Mann (or The Last Laugh) is a German silent movie, starring Emil Jenning's as an elderly doorman at an upperclass hotel who, due to his age, is demoted to lavatory assistant. I am not going to lie to you, it bored me a little bit, probably due to the fact there is no dialogue at all, not even intertitles and also I couldn't relate to the characters. I did fall asleep during the film, but I think that was more to working all day rather than the film.

Anyway, the film just did not fit together, and once it got to the true ending it all seemed a little depressing. The Doorman was shamed and his community had all laughed and shunned him, but then the really silly part of the film came along, the epilogue, which turns this realistic look at shame and status into a farce. In the epilogue, the Doorman inherits millions due to a claus in someones will saying they will leave all of their money to the person whose arms they die in. This is just silly and adds nothing at all to the film, the only thing it does help is show that money makes The Doorman a character who likes the poor to be treated well.

As I said I did not enjoy the film and that is why it is only getting a 2 out of 10 from me. Its a shame as it was very well filmed and it did bring about modern camera techniques, but the film just did not click for me.

Fun fact though, Emil Jennings, was the first person to win the Academy Award for Best Actor in 1928, and also he is the first person to EVER receive as Oscar, as his category was the first one presented.

The Hills Have Eyes - Wes Craven

Having seen he remake, I was looking forward to see how the horror legend that is Wes Craven would present this film, and it was very good. The atmosphere was there, the scares and also it didn't have some of the toot from the remake. Looking at the remake now, even though the effect might be better, the story was butchered from what was a fantastic movie.

The Carter family are what people outside America would view as the typical Americans: smug, arrogant and over the top. The other family, led by Papa Jupiter seem more human in some ways than the Carter's. Ok so most families don't rape others or eat flesh, but the love between them and the camaraderie is just how a family should act.

It is not the best acting in the world, but I think that is probably what makes the horror genre so special, it isn't about the performances, its about the storyline. The Hills Have Eyes has a very unique storyline and it seems new and innovative, even after all these years. One thing that also interested me what that a lot of the action took place during the day, and it felt weird to be able to see the enemy and see what was going on.

On a less serious note, I thought that Martin Speer (who played Doug Wood in the movie) looks a hell of a lot like Simon Helberg (who plays Harold Wolowitz from The Big Bang Theory) as long as Helberg grew a mustache

All in all a sound movie, no great masterpiece but no massive disappointment. I will give this a 4 out of 10, but I want to make this clear, I did enjoy the film very much, I just don't think it has the certain ingredient that would make it outstanding. From now I won't tell you the next film in the blog, it will be available in the upper right hand box that says Next Movie.

Just a quick add-on, apparently The Hills Have Eyes has roots in Scotish legends. Sawney Bean was a Scottish man in the 15-16th century who led a clan of 48ish people to kill over 1000 people and eat them. Thats quite an interesting little fact!

La Femme Du Boulanger - Marcel Pagnol

I know what your thinking, I only watched one this morning, but I seem to have the movie bug, so I thought I would give The Baker's Wife a go. It was interesting, I would not say its one of my favourite films but it ended up very watchable. I can't say I fully agree with the way the story developed though. The baker's wife has an affair and leaves the baker, who then breaks down and refuses to bake bread until she comes back, which she does and they seem to be happy again.

The story just did not seem like it would really happen, but maybe I am just a cynic who does not think someone can have an affair and then go back to the person they were originally with.

For me the support cast really made the film memorable, there was a group of four men who were hilarious, they got drunk and argued about elm trees. The teacher and the curate were also very fun to watch and even the Marquis had some good lines, but hats have to come off to Raimu, who played the baker and acted the socks off of everyone else.

I give this film a 3 out of 10, 3 really comes from the characters but the storyline did not embrace me and the overall feel of the film didn't quench my movie thirst. The next film is The Hills Have Eyes, I am a massive horror fan and can not wait for this. I have seen the modern remake so hopefully this one will not suck like that did.

Little Miss Sunshine - Jonathan Dayton & Valerie Faris

Having seen half of Little Miss Sunshine before, I was not particularly excited to watch it again. I turned it off half way last time due to the fact that I felt the movie wasn't a good story and just was pants. How wrong I was! Watching it again, I found the script funny, I found the acting heart-felt and the movie was an enjoyable experience.

Firstly, Alan Arkin is a wonderful actor. I am so glad he won the Oscar for best supporting actor as he truly deserved it. I wish my grandfather was a heroine sniffing, porn addicted rebel! Secondly, the jokes actually made me laugh, not in a "I am supposed to laugh here" kinda way, but in a "I actually found that humourous" kinda way, which surprised me.

I love Steve Carell and could watch him in almost anything, and he does not dissappoint as the countries former number one expert on Proust. I know this is going to sound bizarre, but this has actually made me want to read some Proust. After the film has finished you can not help but evaluate how close your own family is, and its a real revelation once you start to dig deep into what the relationship is.

In short I want a yellow VW camper van and I will write 8 out of 10 on the side, to show my admoration for such a tiny but significant movie. The next movie is La Femme Du Boulanger, a French film which took me ages to find, but once I did I ended up with two copies. Always a joy!

Topio Stin Omichli - Theo Angelopoulos

Topio Stin Omichli or Landscape in the Mist is a revelation of cinema. This film was beautifully filmed, stunningly acted, gorgeously soundtracked and has really made a strong impression on me.

The shots that were produced really impressed, and just the way it tackled some of the issues was fascinating. For instance the scene in which the little boy and little girl are in a square and in front of them a horse dies and behind them the joviality of a wedding reception. The scene just speaks for itself.

Michalis Zeke is the young boy, Alexandros and he is the cutest little kid you ever did see, and what an actor, for such a young boy I can't think of any better acting in any movie. Tania Palaiologou was wonderful as Alexandros' sister Voula and I actually cried at the way she acted the rape scene, it was just so moving that I felt my heart go out to the girl.

The rape scene was hard to watch but it was very well done, I don't think I have ever seen a rape filmed so well. You could feel the pain and feel how scared the girl was but you did not see or hear much at all.

There were times where I got bored and there were also times when I felt the long camera frames and the pause of the actors to look got a little bit boring, but other than that it is a well executed film, but one that fills you with no hope what-so-ever.

The rating for this is 7 out of 10, just because I felt it was good but it sometimes lacked any story. The next film in the list is Little Miss Sunshine, which hopefully will be a jolly change from Landscape In The Mist.

Giulietta Degli Spiriti - Federico Fellini

Just a few things to clear up before I start this mini review, a) the title is Juliet of the Spirits not Juliet and the Spirits and b) the film is Italian not Spanish. Anyway I actually enjoyed this film, which surprised me as I thought I would hate it. Fellini puts together a very solid and interesting movie which looks into a melancholic wife who has to deal with her desires and her subconscious.

Lead actress, Guilietta Masina (actually Fellini's wife till he died) is very subtle in he portrayal of the titular character and she is a marvellous actress. I will admit though I got lost half way through the movie and also I do think it dragged a little towards the end, but overall it was a solid piece of work.

Some parts of unintentional comedy came from the spirit Olaf, when he spoke through the medium. We can now see where the Exorcist got it's influence from. There were parts which were genuinely scary, for instance the girl who kept appearing as a martyred saint.

Contrary to the other European films I have seen on this list, this one had little sex, and the sex that was portrayed was either of a metaphorical sense or a little flash of breast from the neighbour, Suzy.

All in all I was surprised but not blown away by the film and that's why I shall give it a 5 out of 10. The next film in the running order is a Greek film called Landscape in the Mist. This film was very difficult to get hold of so I am hoping it is worth the hassle.

Delicatessen - Jeunet-Pierre Jeunet and Marc Caro

Oh my goodness, I have fallen in love with this film! Its is just a masterpiece for the eyes! It is witty, charming, beautifully filmed, well acted, dark but also quite light.

The musically choreographed set pieces are fun, and the storyline is one of my favourites. A post-apocalyptic France has spawned a group of people that you will never forget. At the centre of this colony is a butcher, who harvests people for their meet. The story is very complex and I am not going to get into it, but I recommend you watch it.

I cannot think of anything that I did not like about the film, so this is going to be relatively short, but I do want to say a few things about some of the actors. Dominique Pinon as the clown/maintenance man is charming and funny and Jean-Claude Dreyfus as the sardonic butcher, Claret, is menacing and quite scary actually.

Anyway as you may of guessed this is going to be a 10 out of 10 and is a firm favourite of mine. The next film is a spanish film called Juliet and the Spirits, hopefully is going to be as good as Delicatessen.

Forbidden Planet - Fred McLeod Wilcox

So this is the first sci-fi film I have seen that is not Star Wars and it was pretty good. Obviously it has aged and seems very cheesy, especially the dialogue and acting, but that is part of the charm.

It is weird watching Leslie Nielsen play a role in which he doesn't fall down some stairs and make jokes about female genitalia but it was a refreshing change. Its hard to comment about the movie really, as it was not brilliant but it was not awful. It was watchable, a believable storyline (for a science fiction movie) and good effects when you think of when it was made, I think it just lacked that certain something.

I did like the part in the story in which they mentioned the Id, anything which starts to actually look at Freud and the subconscious gets thumbs up from me, and I also enjoyed the character of the Cook. I know he wasn't in the film for long, but when he was he added a farcical side to the movie.

Walter Pidgeon played the best "villain who doesn't know he is the villain" for a long time, and the hammed up acting adds to the retro feel of the film. Robby the robot is so cool, he is the sort of robot I would of designed, with his mini chemical lab and different languages and dialects, absolutely love him!

So I give this film a 4 out of 10. It might seem low, but I did loose interest throughout and at the very moment I feel extremely tired, which nobody should feel at the end of a film.

The next film in the list is another French film called Delicatessen, and this is one I have been waiting to see for a long time!

Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers - Peter Jackson

Another day and another movie blog, and this movie was one which I ahd already seen a few times and knew I would enjoy again. Peter Jackson's masterpiece The Lord Of The Rings has forever had a place on my movie shelf, and watching it again just showed the brilliance it oozes.

Although the second in the trilogy, it keeps up the pace and still has quite a few surprises. Gandalf coming back is possibly one of the greatest moments in movie history, and Gollum's conversation with himself is such an iconic scene. Ian McKellen and Andy Serkis are just gods in my world.

Watch it though it did throw up some bits in which I got bored, mainly the parts where Aragorn and [insert any woman's name here] have a chat. It just bores me, why can't we have dwarves kicking arse for the whole 171 minutes?

Frodo also seems like a little bitch, always moaning and tripping, but other than that a class A movie. Any film in which a group of trees throw rocks and attack Christopher Lee has to be ranked upon the top films of all time!

So, probably a quite expected score of 10 out of 10, but Lord of the Rings has always been a love of mine. Its just a brilliant story, brilliant told, and brilliantly directed by the genius Peter Jackson. If you happen to like Peter Jackson and zombies then maybe you will like Braindead, as long as you have a strong stomach!

The next film in the list is Forbidden Planet, the first sci-fi film in the list!

De Vierde Man (The Fourth Man) - Paul Vehoeven

Wow, just wow! This film was a fantastic piece of art and a gripping story about love, death, passion and lying. Jeroen Krabbe was brilliant as Gerard, an author who goes to give a lecture and meets Christine, played by Renee Soutendijk. The first 'femme fatale' that I have encountered during this movie marathon, she will take some beating.

I seemed to enjoy everything about it, the dialogue translation was clear, the characters were engaging and the storyline was puzzling but at the same time moved at a pace which kept me hooked for the relatively short 99 minutes.

As a man, I will admit that the scene in which Christine cut off Gerard's penis did make me flinch, but other than that the film worked very well. It has also sprung up one of my favourite quotes from the movies I have watched thus far, and that is "I lie the truth" and I like the way that works. At the end of the film, nobody believes Gerard as he is an author, so they expect him to exaggerate the truth, and this ultimately is his downfall and his 'death'

One thing has has struck me in the amount of sex that is in foreign films, this may just be a coincidence but the films I have watched, especially the European ones, seem to have a basis around sex. I shall keep an eye on this idea.

This is my favourite film I have watched so far, and it gets a 8 out of 10. The next film in my list is an epic, Peter Jackson's Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers. I have seen this film before and I am excited to be viewing it again.

The Docks Of New York - Josef Von Stermberg

As I said in my previous post, this is my very first silent film and probably will not be my last. Here is what I thought: it was very good. The story kept me gripped throughout and the music actually fit every situation showed.

The only problem I had was the moral that the film portrayed, especially in conjunction to the main character, Bill Roberts. Bill is a very masculine, manly, blokey bloke, but he seems to think he can get his own way by just pushing people out of the way. Obviously this movie is from a different period to the one we live in now, but still Bill seemed to be compensating for something.

The female character, Mae, was absolutely beautiful. She plays a prostitute in the film, but due to the time it was released, 1928, the film is not made in any outlandish ways, it was just a good story about love, told in a very interesting way.

The ending shocked me slightly as Bill ended up in prison for 60 days, which is not the happily ever after that most love stories are meant to portray.

I will say that during parts, the lack of speech did bore me, but I blame this more on the fact that silent movies aren't made any more.

All in all a quality movie, and a lovely introduction to silent films. This cliche loving author gives this film 5 out of 10. I didn't hate it, but its not going to be on the list of my favourite films of all time.

My mind is slipping, just a heads up on the next movie. Its called The Fourth Man and it is a Dutch film. So currently the foreign films have outweighed the English films, but I look forward to it quite a lot.

What Time Is It There? - Tsai Ming-Liang

I have been looking forward to this movie since watching the shocking Piano Teacher, as I thought it would make a stunning difference. The only thing this movie has taught me is that I am not going to enjoy every single movie in the list.

This sounds harsh, let me explain a few things. There is a lot I like about the movie, I think the acting is brilliant, the story is well put together, and the main characters are likeable and believable. My problems, however, is to do with the way the film as actually shot. Long lingering shots, normally set back a few paces from the action, and if the character leaves the shot, then we are still focused on a suitcase, or a big wheel. It just seems like a one hour film has been stretched to over one hour forty.

Ok the long shots are often beautiful and do add a feeling of loneliness and grief to the situation, but they do not seem to have a point in my opinion. However, as I said before, the way the story is tackled is very clever, with one man's grief for his fathers death being portrayed through this fixation with setting every clock he meets with Paris time, and the female leads part of showing loneliness in a foreign country almost had me in tears, as sometimes it is easy to feel lonely in your own country. Also I enjoyed the portrayal of the mother's grief manifesting itself in completely different ways.

Most disturbing scene had to be in a montage of scenes to connote passion, where the mother seemed to be pleasuring herself with a wicker basket.

Overall I would give this film a 3 out of 10. I enjoyed part of it, but it did not hold my attention for long enough or make me want to keep watching.

The next film on the list is The Docks of New York. This will be the first ever silent film I have watched, and I hope it will keep my attention.

La Pianiste (The Piano Teacher) - Michael Haneke

As predicted, today I started the mammoth task of watching all of the 1068 movies that have appeared in all versions of "1001 Movies To Watch Before You Die" and my first movie has shown me what diversity this list is going to provide. I would never of guessed that the first movie that would be selected was about a sadomasochist piano teacher.

I apologise now, but these 'blogs' are going to be fairly short, but I will try and pack them with my thoughts and feelings about the movie.

Firstly I applaud Michael Haneke for such a stunning movie, but the major applause has to go to Isabelle Huppert who plays the sexually repressed Professor Kohut. She was fantastic, even in the scenes where she was doing unusual things, such as watching a couple have sex in a car while urinating next to said car.

The musical that the pianists played was very well picked and well played, and seemed to capture the longing and repression of the main character. Also I would like to say that Annie Girardot, playing Professor Kohut's paranoid and abusive mother.

Personally, I felt some of the scenes went on a little too long, for instance the 'rape' (was it rape? one of the many questions this film throws up), and also the vagina cutting scene (which reminded me slightly of the Lars Von Trier movie, Antichrist)

A cliche of these sort of blogs is a score, but I am afraid I will have to conform with this cliche. Due to the marvellous acting and the brilliant score I will have to give this movie a 6 out of 10.

Probably not something I shall watch again, but I am glad I was able to watch such an interesting movie.

The next movie in the list, is What Time Is It There? a Taiwanese film which should prove a stark contrast to La Pianiste.

This Blog's Maiden Voyage

The title is a reference to Robert Frost's influential poem The Road Not Taken, and from this alone you can most probably work out a few things about me. If you can't, then let me clear up a few things for you:

• I love poetry
• I study English Literature at University

That is all you could really pick up from the opening gambit, so here are some other nuggets of information:

• My name is Lewis
• I am 22 years old (don't you just hate it when people say "years young")

I think that is enough for the moment. Let me tell you why I started this blog off, and hopefully carry on until I have finished the task in hand. No need to groan, I know every second blog that pops up online at the moment is a life changing task, one which sees people eat every different type of potato, or have a milkshake from every single McDonald's restaurant. Well, if I am going to be honest, this task is not going to change my life and it certainly will not influence my life in anyway.

I have always been a movie fan, I love the idea of movies, I love the publicity around movies, I love the process that movie makers go through, I love the award seasons that reward the movies, I even love the idea of finding that one movie which can be called "the one", but the only thing I seem to have a problem with is actually watching movies. I would say, that on average, I watch a film or two a month, and they are normally very new films or one I have seen a lot of times before.

This leads me then onto the task. Around three or four years ago a book was released, 1001 Movies To Watch Before You Die, and these books always fascinate me, as people buy them and then just ignore them. They flick through, commenting that they have seen that one, and then it ends up on a book shelf with tatty copies of the Highway Code and Martina Cole novels. Well I want to change this, I want to watch all of the 1001 movies. I know this sounds incredibly stupid, but I feel it will be enjoyable. Unlike many different task-blogs, I will not be setting a time limit, as I haven't got the time or money to set limits, but I will make a promise that I shall not go over 10 years. This sounds like a long time, but this works out roughly at 2 movies a week, which is a massive leap for somebody who does not watch many movies.

Now I want to watch all the movies, and this means that I will also watch any movies added to subsequent editions of the book, so altogether 1068 movies. There is a link to the list of movies at this site: http://www.listology.com/flogged/list/1001-movies-you-must-see-you-die, which I will be working from, as well as from the original book. Now the official start date of this mega movie marathon 10 year task will be Friday 26th March, the start of my Easter holiday at Uni and also the due date of my last essay.

If you are wondering how I will pick which movies to watch and in which order, then I shall be using a random number generator, which is available via http://www.random.org/. The number that is given will correspond to the list on the link I provided above.

I hope this explains the reasoning and the task in enough detail. And for anyone that may of read that, but I am not hopeful, the first movie I will be watching is number 984, which is The Piano Teacher, a French film which I have personally never heard of before.

Thank you again for reading!